I believe it’s possible for our experiences to deviate from reality. After all, everything we experience is processed through our mind, so it stands to reason the mind itself can get in the way, distorting the truth of an experience. I’ve seen this in my own life: I tell myself a story and keep retelling the story until I begin to believe the story. But my belief in the story doesn’t make it real. And the fact I’m unaware my story isn’t real doesn’t keep me out of trouble when the story influences my behaviors. So how do I stay aware of what’s real, and what’s generated from the chatterbox in my head?
|These are patterns I’ve observed cause me to remain unaware that I’m caught up in my own story:||In contrast, these are patterns I’ve observed cause me to become more aware:|
|Withholding experiences; not sharing my experiences with others||Sharing experiences; self-disclosure|
|Being defensive or feeling attacked||Being open, dropping or loosening my defenses, becoming vulnerable|
|Defending my beliefs||Willing to be wrong, willing to learn|
|Being ready to blame||Taking responsibility, becoming accountable|
|Being ready to judge||Looking for ways to love|
|Resisting as the world around me changes||Accepting the world as it changes around me|